Atom Ant...

There is not color, there is not  light
just atoms in motion,
like hummingbirds in flight;
bouncing around the cosmos,
hoping, with luck, they might
pass before the eyes of Man
whose mind belongs to Forever,
whose questions started
before his life began...
Though he cannot understand
he sees the Light,
he brings it all into focus
without having a clue as to the plan,
leaving him querulous and timorous
and back to where he began

Is the Universe ours
or are we another cog
in the Big Wheel, creaking and spinning,
like a hearse rolling through the fog?
Are we Children of Light
or Demons of the Night?
Good intentions notwithstanding,
we all know wrong from right
Pitfalls and pratfalls,
a life spent listening to the wolves call
with only more questions
and not one answer at all
in Man's Search for Meaning...
               (10-31-10)

The Stand...

How is it you can look at the sky
and know what time of year it is?
Is it the angle of the sun
changing the hues
or the chill in the air,
whispering hints to the tints
with frosty voice blowing plumes
in the shadow of the pines?

Always huddled together,
a true stand of trees
refuting Nature's cold;
too proud to bend their knees,
too strong to let go of leaves
with lessons hard learned and hard earned ,
fighting for every inch of rocky ground
Sentinels of the Forest,
bearing Nature's brunt for the rest
This is their lot, this is their test
and they bear it proudly
Noble Pines, may your soul be mine...
                (10-31-10)

The Moon is a Harsh Mistress...

 Night falls but the Moon rises;
brushing clouds from her face
as her hair cascades down the Milky Way,
the hem of her gown, soft as eiderdown
so as not to move the stars in their place
She has followed the Sun since both were young;
enraptured and captured in a moment,
a fleeting glimpse as night turned to day
watching over Earth at night
as she spun, arms akimbo,
taking in the warmth and light
If you look carefully during the day
you will find her in the sky still
as if by strength of will 
she escapes the Darkness
for that which gives her heart a thrill,
content, like the rest of us, to wonder and guess
how the heart speaks without thinking
what the mind won't confess...
               (11-01-10)

Similar Souls...

Like Icarus waiting for his wings
hoping to one day fly to the sun
Quasimodo waiting to ring the bells,
signalling a new day has begun
Diogenes, with lantern in hand,
still searching for the honest man
with arms grown weary and eyes filled with tears
as he wanders, a ghost, in the streets of Athens...

Searching for Dr. Livingstone, i presume
or Marie Curie ?
( i hear she glows in a dark room)
Inspiration and collaboration;
both come and go too soon,
the jostling and hustling, the eternal bustling
of people needing their own space,
looking for elbow room...

Like Crusoe with no Friday,
a lonely jester holding court
the echoes of his bitter laughter
are the only retorts
Played this game so long
he has come to know his part
but that doesn't mean he has to like the play
Who wrote the damn thing, anyway?...
            (11-01-10)

I Listen...

 Here come the words again,
floating in the air like whispered sigh
Wandering above me,
wondering if i have seen them
Sometimes they call to me
echoes of their laughter in my ears
for i never know when they may appear before me

Let me listen, now, for another line
go back and read, just to give them time
Are these my thoughts i write or am i someone else
as the Witching Hour casts its spell?

Now, comes the vision clear
focusing my soul ,
the cosmic test tube baby,
hoping one day i might, just maybe, make it
Square peg in a round hole, forever on a leash,
always under someone or something's control;
trying to pick up the shattered pieces of my life
and make myself whole

Here come the words again,
there behind my eyes as i close them slowly,
wondering why i am the only one who sees them
Is this a gift or curse?
if i wasn't this, would i be worse?
why am i always searching for the next verse, anyway?

Let me listen, now, for another line
go back and read just to give them time
Are these my thoughts i write or am i someone else
as the Witching Hour casts its spell?
                   (11-02-10)

Wings...

Birds of Fire,
how words inspire
feathers floating free
memories dear to me
remembered as i fall,
crying, to my knees

My soul can not bear the weight
my heart can not bear the wait;
to know that it's too late
and yet, the bird will soon fly free ...

Like a bird, to take wing
to trill, chirp and sing
with talons sharp and delicate
to the highest branch you'll cling

Wait for us there, my friend
if we earn that seat
Friends forever, even if we never
have a chance again to meet...
               (11-02-10)

Wooded Wonder...

Cry morning,
and  send the wrens fluttering skyward
from their roosts in the brush,
nesting closer to the ground
as the weather turns cold
Dawn  breaks,
in a flurry of kaleidoscope colors,
working their way under the black
and lifting the Veil of Darkness
high above their heads in triumph...

A night spent wandering the wood
brings daylight to my eyes
in tints and tinges,
On fallen logs i step as to make no sound,
branches held away as i walk past
by my my trusty quarterstaff
Listening to the waking of the wood;
the scrambling of squirrels,
scurrying of chipmunks,
the rambling gait of the hart,
turkeys stretching before they start
on their morning constitutional
and all of this is not unusual;
just another day in God's Green Acre...
                     (11-03-10)

Are You?...

Is this my therapy,
is this all that is left of me,
a voice with no substance
coming out of the Darkness,
placing a mist before your eyes
to slip away into forest shadows
and hide from sunlight and prying eyes?
An earthbound oddity, a strange entity
like an accident you must see
a toxin, a pox upon the face of humanity
hiding like a leper lest you see
sins committed upon him festering still
leaving him only questions and very little will to live
just a will to be what he himself rarely sees;
someone who is truly happy...
           (11-04-10)

Eternal Mother...

From within you and into the light,
for without you i would have never seen it
i was your dream you brought to life
through the power of love, sparkling and gleaming
You lived through me and for me;
there was never a second thought
i knew you adored me
You kept me close, yet let me be free
to discover the world on my own
There was always a place called home
to parade home in triumph
or to trudge alone in sadness
but either way your arms where there
with your love and kindness
Your rock, your diamond in the rough,
will shine on in remembrance of you
and all the things you taught me
i was caught the moment i heard your heart beat
in the darkness of your womb
           (11-05-10)

Summa Cum Laude...

In the Hall of Science
listening to the silence looming,
the light of Bunsen burner
reflected in the windows
as i feel the Chemistry
between my lab partner and me
Thoughts turn to Biology,
the Circle of Life, the birds and bees
feeling that familiar weakness in my knees
ah, the Law of Attraction...

In the Halls of Literature,
reading the Greats
but searching for my own signature
listening to the pages flutter
sitting together, but miles from each other
as the words carry us to other worlds or other times
or poetic musings and images sublime

What will you learn in the Halls of Academia?
The world lies gleaming at your feet
but, first, find what is in you
Love to learn, learn what you love
Know what lies beneath the Truth
try to find a way above
Separate the wheat from chaff
for not all learn from good example
Learn not how to earn a living
learn what you need to live...
          (11-05-10)

Dream Warrior...

Do you see me in your dreams
caught there, between the seams
of the realm of reality and possible destiny
Then take a walk with me along a trail to see
all that is , all that was and what may yet be
i have no answers, i see little sense
in a lifetime of giving freely
with such sour recompense
My life has been mountains and valleys,
my emotions, ever intense,
At least i can say i will never die bored,
not one for sitting on the fence
Speak my mind, now, as i grope blindly
try to be polite, respectful and kindly
i would not mind if  forever i roam
here in my heart i hold you
by the warmth of my hearth, my home...
               (11-06-10)

First Fallen...

In the confusion that is my life
no resolution, no conclusions
just that many more questions
some that i am afraid to ask
fearing i might be brought to task
for something as simple as my opinion
forgive my naivete, to be foolish enough to say
what i feel, not what i think
for i am never sure what that is;
if my thoughts are my own
or one of the thousand other possibilities
as i ponder my capabilites and my faults,
some horrors still locked within dark vaults,
not safes but tombs, ghostly rooms
where shadows lengthen
for what does not kill you 
does not always strengthen
sometimes it leaves you too exhausted to give a damn
Sadly, this is where i am today, or should i say tonight?
Ask me tomorrow by the morning light
and then see what i might have to say
but for now sadness fills me to the marrow;
a spectre, living among the fog shrouded barrows,
grim reminders of long ago lost battles
falling under a black rain of arrows
that all found their way to my heart...
              (11-06-10)

Season's Greetings...

The first flurries of the season
have reason to hurry,
for the sun will soon rise
and they want to coat the grass
with a blanket of  white
to fill you with wonder and delight
and no little surprise before they fade
melting on the blades of grass
The wind is blowing and swirling
snowflakes dancing and twirling
by the base of trees and about my knees
they seem to almost curl
cold fingers, finding warmth to cling to
if you listen closely you can hear them sing
before the breeze blows them on their way;
"Winter came to visit today"...
         (11-08-10)

Autumn Air...

The sights and smells of Autumn
as sunlight lights up the colors
of the leaves as they follow each other
in a spiralling dance down to the Earth
In the sheer mirth of the squirrels,
with the quick flicker of tails,
as they chase each other
in a merry go round game up the trees
as the breeze wafts by
with the scent of cinnamon
and apple pie
and the tint to the sky
tells you somehow the air is crisp
in this and in the smell of decay
as leaves molder and rot
Dig beneath them and feel the Earth,
hot to the touch...
Inner warmth, outer beauty;
i've a life in a moment as such
and never regret an instant...
        (11-07-10)

Prayers on the Wind...

 If hope is a thing with feathers
then faith is the air on which it glides
to believe you need  to stand against ill winds
you cannot turn tail to run and hide
for in our tests rest the answers
without music would there be any dancers
sometimes all it takes is the nerve
to believe you have earned, to know you deserve
more than what has been your lot but what you have got
other than you own determination
that may waver in the face of adversity?

The simple Truths always come back to me
i feel, i love , i fail  - that is all a part o f me
but faith and hope lift me up
like a prayer fan held in my hand
hoping the spirits understand
that this tortured soul , like everyone one else
is a flawed man grasping at the wind
praying it carries him to a happy end...
               (11-08-10)

Scorpia...

One of my first cyber friends,
in fact if not in form
Traveling across the wires
found a pure heart
and a soul that's warm
We've shared laughter and tears,
spoken of hope, consoled each others fears
We have held each other electronically,
you have become dear to me
without ever being near me
but by being there
It's funny how we can care
for someone we have never met
but there is the wonder of the Internet,
for somehow the soul still comes through,
no need for you to reboot...
          (11-09-10)

Milky Way...

The Waking Dream, with eyes wide open
caught somewhere between
wishful thinking and praying and hoping
for though the stars gleam
not many are chosen to feel their warmth
Freckles of light in the sky
that have for countless eons
begged the questions what and why
Of so many things that catch our eye
the furthest fascinates most
Are they lights behind the Curtain of Night,
watching from backstage
while the Moon shines, reflecting the Sun's light
as Dawn prepares once more
for her flight of fancy
her dance along the horizon?
Or are they the Tears of God
spread across the Cosmos
to let you know that he knows
and feels your pain?...
          (10-09-10)

Share the Sunrise...

Which is the last star left gleaming
just above the rosy glow
the blue, the pink, the cream
blending into the ever widening blue ?
Has it been a name?
You all know that game,
how Man marks what he can't explain
and calls it his own
Like finding a land that is already there
in wanting it all, far more than your share
as in knowing right from wrong and not really caring
until the fiddler asks his due...

This i see reflected in the tints and hues
always unexpected as i watch the sunrise bloom
So many sights and wonders just outside this room
not just for  me if we share the words...
          (11-09-10)

High Rock...

Lavender sunset, liquid and buoyant;
this is one of the simple pleasures i take joy in,
with colors so vivid it seems the horizon can't hold them
as they pop like balloons, highlights bursting on the leaves
while Darkness races to hide Brother Shadow...

This isn't what i know, this is what i see
You ask me how is it i see this;
i ask, how is it you don't
Won't you take a walk with me
to a place of Power,
mingle with the Sacred and the Earth,
await the Magic Hour
when the portals open and there is no stopping
when the Wind cries and when it whispers ?
Come share the moment with me
and see if we both can listen...
         (11-10-10)

Silver Sliver of a Moon...

Halo Moon as Night begins to bloom;
the stars begin to wake,
rubbing sleep from their eyes
winking and blinking till Dawn
slips through the Curtain of Darkness
sending them back to their beds
far beyond the Land of Nod...

The candy cane colors of the highway,
red taillights and  white headlights,
moving back and forth along the asphalt river
winding through the countryside,
tracing the valleys to the sea;
visible now as the trees shed their leaves,
the seasons change giving new wonders to see...

From this same spot, so many visions
unity, parity, discord and division
the world spins on endlessly
a constant change of position
so why not see things in a different way?...
          (11-10-10)

Soul Shadow...

I am the Ghost of a Ghost,
caught between the living and the dead
i am a Shadow in the corner of you eye,
gone when you turn your head,
leaving you wonder more what than why
as form does not always follow function
but the soul of you never lies
I am a whisper on the breeze,
the weakness in your knees
a hit to the pit of your stomach
in moments of clarity and charity;
just giving what i see
Forever lost, forever tossed
on Life's tumultuous seas
A lifetime wandering
an Eternity pondering
questions without resolutions,
lives hanging in the balance
and forgone conclusions
hoping, no praying, for his inclusion
in the Grand Scheme of things
for these dreams are all i see...
     (11-11-10)

Where the Wind Blows...

Moments when i'm world weary;
in seconds my eyes grow teary
Funny, i nearly made it through the day
without tears splashing on my face
The Past is never erased,
lines etched deep that trace
tracks of my tears
pain through the years
that never fails to find me
It is myself who binds me,
the shackles shake and rattle
to keep time with my fading heart,
torn apart too many times
Born apart, on some other line,
resurrected  but still disconnected ,
a feather in the wind...
         (11-11-10)

A Little Bird Told Me...

The sunrise will find me
and be surprised when he sees
the look of content already in place,
not sadness or resentment;
a look of peace upon my face
Last  night, the moon found me sleeping
and she said she'd be keeping this secret
for i looked so peaceful 
she said she'd wait for me till morning
when i would rise stretching and yawning
like a cat sleeping on a window sill
Heard secrets will hold
like my heart that is full,
this i am told  as a lone bird begins to warble
He too rose early
refreshed and eager
To look forward to the coming day...
              (11-13-10)

Run a Little Longer...

Music is the memory of my Life;

songs from long ago,

capturing Emotions i remember

but no longer feel,

for i have steeled myself too long

in my meager efforts to get along,

though in a moment i'm lost in a song

and either smiling or crying,

all my old friends are passing

like good times remembered;

their Music will last, here,

within my Broken Heart,

behind my Tired Eyes

Long May We Run, indeed,

if just looking for a place to cry...

      (11-12-10)

Spirals in the Night...

On the line between the quiet of  Night
and the bustle of the morning;
hear the rustle of the leaves ,
as unseen creatures walk the Darkness
with eyes grown accustomed to the blackness
Why is it Man has not adapted?
Surely, Charles we have not reach our peak

In the silence i find solace,
Mankind sleeps as spirits watch us
and toss visions into our dreams
that in the morning we don't believe

Perhaps that is why Sleep rarely finds me,
waiting for signs to remind me
and they come, sleeping or no
while sometimes in dreams confusion grows
for sometimes one discovers the Truth
by realizing the lie...
      (11-12-10)

Like Souls...

A glint of light caught my eyes
from the brambles in the woods
as i stood on the deck overlooking the valley
straining my neck and squinting to see
a doe resting there looking back at me
ready to begin her circuit
as the fog rises about her
to disappear as the morning sun
warms the cool air hiding in the shadows....
As she stands without a sound
she raises her neck, slowly at first
and then in hurried motions,
trying to get me to move
My Vision, wondering
if the the Shadow she sees,
defiant in the sun,
is but her dream...
      (11-13-10)

Yellow Brick Road it Ain['t...

As the line of light grows on the horizon
and the kettle starts to heat,
morning and i have a moment alone;
away from exhaust pipes
and shrill ringing phones,
far from concrete sidewalks
and roads no longer  leading to Rome
taking us further from the Truth,
leading us into tempation
and delivering us to the Evils waiting there...

Too many souls scrambling for the light,
working like Hell to find a piece of Heaven
only to lose their souls is not worth the fight
nor from sky will fall manna unleavened
What little control we have comes from within
we decide what path to take,
long before the journey begins
pick and choose, decide what is right
and what is your right
and live according your love
and you life will be set right....
          (11-14-10)

Cast No Shadow...

As the sliding glass doors leading to the deck
magnify the sun's warmth,
so do my thoughts intensify my emotions
It is no magic potion, unguent or lotion;
simply my mind catching up with my heart
For what may seem like an innocuous start,
words spoken through a door,
might leave the world open
with a universe yet to explore
Travel back with me, remember simpler times
unravel the mystery, understand our history
Something lingers in the touch of your fingers,
never ending, forever a new beginning
Today, the moon glows and the sun shines bright
but i need not look up
to know i have seen the light...
            (11-14-10)

An Honest Praver..,

To be polite without being insincere

for that always leave a hollow ring in my ear

To be courteous without being condescending

that would be a mixed message you're sending

To temper my words with my heart,

knowing a slip of the tongue  can tighten the knot

of the noose of misunderstanding

To land with both feet on the ground,

to keep my eyes on the prize

and not be distracted by all the actors,

players and posers who who thumb their noses

and roll their eyes heavenward

at honest souls searching for control

To express myself 
without trying to impress anyone else,

to say what i see and what's on my mind

though, like the rest of you,  i am just as blind

This i my goal, this is my prayer

to live the best i can and always continue to care

Lord God, help me get there....

               (11-14-10)

Gallow's Hill...

As the years have past
the wonder of Christmas has been lost
and i'm left to wonder at the cost of a lost childhood
How, in growing up, i have seen the avarice, the greed
replace the gift we all need;
the gift of each others humanity
The oft misquoted line,"Money is the root of all evil"
No, it is the love of money, the ever hungry need for more
that takes advantage while giving so much less
As if happiness lies in the gift and not the giver
It's the knowing the gift is mere token
that cannot compare to the emotion given,
the love that has risen between you and another
But, wait, here is another commercial  to fill you children
with high hopes while draining meager wallets
despite Black Friday sales
Beginning to look a lot like retail , indeed, dear friend
                        (11-15-10)

Black Friday Blues...

As the years have past
the wonder of Christmas has been lost
and i'm left to wonder at the cost of a lost childhood
How, in growing up, i have seen the avarice, the greed
replace the gift we all need;
the gift of each others humanity
The oft misquoted line,"Money is the root of all evil"
No, it is the love of money, the ever hungry need for more
that takes advantage while giving so much less
As if happiness lies in the gift and not the giver
It's the knowing the gift is mere token
that cannot compare to the emotion given,
the love that has risen between you and another
But, wait, here is another commercial  to fill you children
with high hopes while draining meager wallets
despite Black Friday sales
Beginning to look a lot like retail , indeed, dear friend
                    (11-15-10)

What's in a Name...

Do you see me at all
do you think you know who i am?
Look but don't listen
and you will never understand
Surely  there is more to you than this;
physicality fades, like the taste of a kiss
Just as i am the sum of my words and deeds
all bottled within this flawed man,
you must look to how you present yourself
Show some self respect,
try to be in command of your base instincts
for that is all that distinguishes us
from pigs wallowing in the mud
from leeches sucking on blood
For many years i have withstood
but now i say,
this i can live without;
as if the physical is what life is all about
When you think you understand
what i have said
let me know, give me a shout
for i may be many things
and i have played many roles
but i will not play the lout...
          (11-21-10)

Sandy Bottom...

A warm November rain
beats the rhythm on the windowpanes
Early morn and here sit i again
by flickering screen and candlelight
Questions borne on the breeze,
supplications on bended knee,
my mind will wander wherever it pleases
returning to find me here
Near the window, by my flame
this is now old hat,
getting pretty good at this game
said  without pride, certainly without shame;
just another confounding situation i can not explain away
Blinded by science we have all become,
losing the wonder under the microscope
what became of playfulness and fun?
The devil is in the details indeed
and that is where we're trapped
between him , his minions and the deep blue sea...
               (11-17-10)

It Gets Better...

He's the kid you all remember
with the girl's walk and girl's voice
Effeminate in kindergarten,
what makes you think it was his choice?
Do you think he woke up one day
and decided he was gay,
decided his sexual preference
before he learned the games we all play?
Did he make you wonder,
maybe doubt yourself,
Did you think he was so different
or did you see just a little of yourself?
Is that the fear makes hate appear
in defense of your guilt?
Stone by stone you'll come to live alone
behind the wall that you have built...

The world is full of people full of soul
a little shows from the outside
the rest from within it grows
You never know just what you'll find
behind a strangers smile
but no longer strangers then;
friends....
          (11-18-10)

Just Saying...

If you believe in nothing then it's always something
between you and your goal, grabbing and taking hold
in the empty spot where your soul once resided...
You cannot hide empty eyes that look upon the world 
despising the faults they possess seen in others ,
the saving grace they do not
What to do about fervor lost,
wherever do you turn until it returns?
Sometimes all it takes is someone else's belief in you
It's a relief to know you still exist  on another's plane
and trains of thought and in precious memories bought dearly,
nearly lost to tide and time brought back resurrected, ethereal, sublime
like a cloud changing shape with the wind
giving you visions and images again and again
running the gamut, taking a gambit
live is lived once as far as i know
you might as well try to enjoy it...
          (11-18-10)

Songs from the Wood (II)...

By rain-borne stream
as in a dream,
the leaves gleam, branches glisten
and Morning sings her song,
if you have an ear to listen
Funny, of the things i have missed
over time, it is these images sublime
that capture me, enrapture me,
bring me to my knees in tears
I cannot help but seek them
they speak tomes to me
as i tread alone among the stones and fallen trees,
going wherever the spirit pleases,
through ferns still green, brambles or tall weeds
This is the Essence of me,
this is the Presence i need...
         (11-17-10)