Pagliacci...

I am the fool
who makes you think
after the chuckle
writing down emotions
that made my knees tremble and buckle
Not a school
but we all learn from each other
Golden Rules and other tools
taught by mother
never prepared me for this
The bliss and the agony,
the torment that lives within me
Will i ever be free of this
and do i want to be?
So much more heroic
to live a life of tragedy
than to muse on the mudane
but the strain is great
when it seems you don't decide your fate...
i've spent a lifetime waiting
for my moment
and i'm still on hold,
for i have never had control
of my life, my emotions or my soul
and tired of the ringing in my ear
or is that just a dial tone?
"the number you have reached
is no longer in service"...
i live and love so much
but to what end, what purpose?
sometimes there seems only one way out
and above and beyond
but i suppose it depends
what precipice you look down from...
               04-15-10