Sea of Discontent...

Cast adrift like so much flotsam and jetsam
     riding the waves of anxiety and fear
is where you will find me,
     struggling to keep my head above water
in a deluge not all of my making
     What starts me quaking, trembling and shaking
is the fear i will not be good enough
     or that my meager attempts will not be good enough
to stem the tide of hurt feelings and broken pride
     when at last there is not place left to hide
and you stand alone and in the open
      Where's my chance, slim though it may be
was i the last and furthest to fall
     from my family tree,
must i always accept my failures
     as just the way that things must be,
is there not another path for me?
     Don't i deserve better,
couldn't i see sunny weather
     for i would take any other life
than the one that i lead now...
                11-06-11